Lingerie lame-o

So, in the world of lingerie I am completely…. lame!

I’m not one to shy away from some well fitted underclothing but I admit it I have no lingerie game. zero. zilch.

It’s not that I haven’t thought about it – I’m not a robot. But I’m a bit more conservative when it comes to the bedroom. I enjoy a comfy pair of long johns like any maple syrup lovin’ Canadian chic! they are so cute and practical!

But in all honesty I just never embraced lingerie because, for me, it just didn’t seem right.

Somehow this is supposed to be sexy. Is she trying to smoke her undies for flavor? Call me confused.
Somehow this is supposed to be sexy. Is she trying to smoke her undies for flavor? Call me confused.

Blazers? Yes, essential wardrobe staple. Corset? Not so much! Flip Flops? Absolutely! Thongs? I don’t think so (the thong song excluded).

But lately I have decided to get me some confidence, my post baby body is not so bad (it only took 3+ years) and I realized today that DAMMIT I don’t see why I should shy away from things. I had a baby for fricks sakes, I let strangers see my hoo-haw but I can’t wear some stockings? Psshaw!

SO I thought I would investigate and share the hilarity with you! The misadventures are the best part.

I will say this – PLEASE for all that is unmentionables, avoid buying online. I do these things to help my fellow humans. Buying online works if you are familiar with the brand/sizing. In my case I gambled and I lost.

I braved a store to find answers. I was looking for a place that wasn’t filled with teenage sales girls who shouldn’t be trying to upsell me pasties (EW!).

There's nothing wrong with buying underwear, just don't try to sell me matching pasties! Get away from me
There’s nothing wrong with buying underwear, just don’t try to sell me matching pasties! Get away from me

But I also didn’t want someone like my mother. (what a buzzkill!) So I found a place and I will say this: I don’t know what the store did with the change room lighting but HOly Moly where can I get that set up? my skin looked radiant! 🙂 Besides the change room ambiance I only fell over once (ok, twice) and the sales girl who helped me didn’t laugh… too hard. They didn’t bug me while shopping so kudos to them for leaving me the heck alone.

In the end I found something not too risky and not too long john-y or full flannel so I’m thinking I’m heading in the right direction. Plus I liked the stores other holiday jammy options so I’m most certainly heading back for snowflake patterned long johns. HOT!

What about you? have you had any underwire mishaps that are hilarious and you want to share? this might be the place to tell! Try on a hair band that turned out to be a tube top? High -five the sales girl that kept the weirdo guy out of the change room area? If we can’t laugh what have we got!

Have a great weekend friends,



camping with kids

Summer is officially over, Hello Fall!

I thought it would be fun to talk about all the summer stuff now 🙂

We can stay cozy inside and reminisce about the fun adventures of summer 2015 together.

In late August we decided to try a short camping trip with our toddler, now I wouldn’t say that the entire trip was all things amazing all the time. But all of the little stuff added up to one hell of a trip. it was a nice learning experience, I found out that it is possible to camp with a little one without losing your mind (anxiety girl over here did not sleep so well leading up to the trip) but I found by making a few lists ahead of time and talking it out we prepared for the trip well and might do it again next summer.

The little things that really added up for me made the trip so great. My husband is the outdoorsy camping guy, I’m the I camped to stay up late with my friends and get drunk / spend all weekend sleeping on the beach gal so I really had to prepare myself for 1. there would be minimum to no drinking  2. I had to make sure no one fell in the fire pit 3. oh right, I’m a mom.

But seriously, the 3 days away were really great after all. I owned the crap out of my messy clothes and the fine coating of dirt and accepted the fact that this trip was more about my husband and daughter making memories then it was about me. This time, it wasn’t about me. And I was ok with that.

The standout moments from our trip came down to 5 things:

  • We made the most of our roadtrip to and from Algonquin park with almost NO drama. No one was car sick, the car wasn’t so ridiculously stuffed with our shit that we could actually see out the windows. I’m proud to say we may have figured out what to pack/not pack
  • We hiked a 2+km trail just the 3 of us, no one around and just a butt load of trees. We had a group hug at the end b/c our daughter walked the entire way. #celebratethesmallthings

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  • I was worried about how sleeping in a tent would work for our little one, would the sun wake her at the crack of dawn? apparently not! it was probably b/c I bundled her into this jammy caccoon that kept her all snug as a bug. Not even kidding, we brought fleece footy jammies and a sherpa sweater… for August… in Ontario. Layers are the Key …. and a tuque. Always have an effing tuque.
  • the water was cold but my husband humored me and I had the chance to swim every day. swimming is one my THINGS (add it to the growing list of THINGS!) But one spot in particular really changed my day. I was swimming at East Beach, and as I was looking at the trees surrounding me there was this deafening silence of a moment for me, a clarifying moment. it sounds so cliche, but it happened right then and I realized how small I was in this insanely huge world.
  • watching the stars come out with my kid. to be up in Algonquin really is a game changer when it comes to seeing stars, and I’m a fan of the universe and all the burning balls of gas up there. Just beautiful.

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If my daughter could tell you what her favorite parts from our trip where she would probably tell you:

  • Comfort stations – regular bathrooms are no longer acceptable places to go pee
  • dirt is amazing – I spent time “sweeping” the camp site when we arrived
  • Road trips mean chocolate milk – parents bribed me with chocolate milk
  • My mom was filthy but I had lots of clean clothes – I’m glad someone was looking after me, I was cozy

What about you? was there something fun this summer that really made it the BEST ever? did you have an awesome staycation? Insane Adventure? What made this summer super fun for ya? I’d love to hear about it


Stickers are the answer!

That’s right friends, if you have kids you’re probably saying “No Shit Ainsley!” well you can stop reading.

But seriously! I had thought stickers were for the age when you had a sticker collection!  You can tell I’m a kid of the late 80s to 90s. I had a book with pages dedicated to different styles – puffy, sparkly, artificial fruit smell, NKOTB etc. NO?! just me?

I guess we can add “kids are sticker fiends” to the already long list Stuff about Being a Parent, and those dang Kids, I didn’t know.

I recently discovered the power of stickers. I have a toddler and we are entering the Potty Zone! It’s that time in my life when I have to embrace all things poop. I swore before I became a mom that I would refrain from poo chatter. I was that jerk sans kids who agreed with my husband “we won’t talk about poop all the time, we will stay current and keep up with important social issues” eff off former child free snobby self, hate to break it to you but at some point in the day your partner might ask you for the poop scoop.

But this post was really supposed to be about the power of stickers. What is it that makes stickers so fascinating? they are sticky, colorful… wait I’m starting to see now. I fear the day that stickers no longer work as a bargaining chip, one day she will see through my thin veil of lies and call me out. In the mean time her potty chart is very busy with stickers and hopefully some day soon we will be diaper free! #celebratethesmallstuff

What about you? have you found a trick to help in the potty training department? do you still have your sticker collection?

All the stickers we can find are now ending up on the Potty Chart. Good thing my husband and I horded stickers for so long!

*please note: there may be future posts related to shit, toilet humor and other items considered inappropriate, it’ll be hilarious!

Ice Cream

It’s the little things that we need to appreciate. The funnypetiteandsweet things.

I was waiting in my car for the light to turn green and I was distracted by all of the wonderfully different people walking by. I was near the park and it was sweltering! one of those stupid hot days (one I promised I wouldn’t complain about!) and I saw lots of people trying their best to stay cool.

Just off to the side there is a randomly placed bench under beautiful old trees. this little patch of heaven is squeezed b/w a few roads, a grocery store and a seniors/assisted living home. And sitting on the bench was a woman, an octogenarian with the BIGGEST tub of ice cream I have ever seen and a single plastic spoon. under the shade of these trees it didn’t matter about the cars, she was enjoying the spoon of ice cream and the look on her face was so content, satisfied and happy. Just. Happy. One single moment. and it made me happy too.

No fuss, no cares, just a giant tub of Neapolitan and a single spoon.

The tub of ice ceam
A Giant Tub of Ice Cream

Looking back I wish I could have taken a picture of her enjoying her ice cream, I think of the image as I try to dial back the crazy, as I focus on the small things and not the huge things that are out of my control. it is this image of contentment that we all aspire to. Finding the simple things and finding happiness.

That is what I want for today and tomorrow and the next day.


A giant tub of ice cream and a single spoon.

What simple, small (or large) thing makes you happy?


Happy Birthday to… YOU!

Happiest of Birthdays to you!

There is nothing like celebrating a friend’s birthday, I’m one of those people who has grown to dislike my day of birth.

I realized that it’s denial on my part, getting older comes with so many exciting challenges. For adults I think it is the fact that another birthday has gone by and it is a reminder of all of the things we haven’t had the chance to tackle. How could this year be gone already?! So many crafts I wanted to start!

But when you’re 8 and you have your first slumber party or you turn 16 and your parents surprise you with the basketball net (THANKS MOM & DAD!). Having a birthday when you’re a kid is full of awesomeness!

BUT as you get older the milestone birthdays are the ones that start to get really fun! For me it’s even more fun when it’s for someone else! Not that long ago a group of friends celebrated Kat’s 30th Birthday. We celebrated BIG time! All grown up and stuff,

I’m talkin’ hotel party y’all!

Hotel party! Obligatory novelty napkins, fruit display and party guests

If you’re a baseball fan you have probably thought about having a party at the hotel that connects to the SKYDOME Rogers Centre. I have to tell you, this party did not disappoint. I was surrounded by people I love, there was food, dranksss and no kids. I can’t speak for everyone, but I had a great time! I made some new acquaintances, had the chance to catch up with my friends and got to have a sleep over with my hubs in a king size bed. With comfy pillows.

I hope that Kat had a great time, and judging by the pics I would say she did indeed.

Happiest of Birthdays to you Kat! I think she was surprised!

Happiest of Birthdays to you Kat! I think she was surprised!

What about you? Have you been to a memorable birthday party? A good theme party you want to tell us about? Did you have a fantastic party thrown in your honor?



jean machine

Not too long ago I was kinda pissed at my husband.

My husband is a fan of all things clothing related. He is a loyal GQ subscriber, enjoys shopping at Winners and always tries to look his very best. he is my go to when I want to make sure I don’t look like a hobo as I’m going out the door to playgroup/the pet store/craft shoppe/restaurant etc.

he is the person I envy when it comes to wardrobe, well I envy his ability to find clothes that fit, plus I envy the ladies in my life and famous people and their clothing but that’s not realistic (Hellloooo personal stylists & tailors!). To be honest I have found that pushing a human the size of a watermelon out of my bajingo has made finding things that fit a bit of a challenge (and did I mention frustrating? no one told me that would happen!) and I don’t have to “dress up” to go to work in my home office…

Anywho! we came upon a sale at the Gap (when don’t they have a sale amiright?!) and my hubby bought new jeans. To say my husband has a few pairs in his closet, is an understatement, at last count I saw about 8 to 10 pairs. Plus he does seem to take his sweet time wearing clothes out. To show you what I mean here is a pic of his jeans that are about 4 years old next to his brand new pair (same wash, style). It got me thinking wow! what a life these jeans have had, in 4 years hubby-o-mine has done a lot. He became a father (gulp!) started a new job, worked on house projects, traveled, and lived! as much as a person can on a tight budget 🙂

I couldn’t stay pissed b/c, lets face it, he looks good in those denim blues. What I can do is be happy that he is happy wearing his jeans and that he is living his life, and his clothes, to the max.

What about you? Do you have a favorite pair of jeans or a sweater that is almost rags you just can’t bear to part with? do you have an item in your closet that you wish you had multiples of?

Hubby Jeans circa 2011 (LH) compared to recent purchase 2015
Hubby Jeans circa 2011 (LH) compared to recent purchase 2015

Ben & Jen – say it ain’t so!

I love how celebrity divorces take on a life of their own thanks to the internets.

Of course I don’t mean that I enjoy families falling apart and all the unhappiness, but what I think is hilarious is how a celeb marriage comes under such scrutiny. Gossip rags analyze every photo to death trying to find some sort of body language, cue that “signaled” things were ending (I’m looking at you Cosmo). just because the person isn’t smiling in the photo (probably #4 of 3000) doesn’t mean that things are falling apart. or does it? BenandJenFrom what I have seen online it sounds like Bennifer 2.0 are doing things right, as far as celebrity divorces can go, they made a quick announcement and then packed up the kids and Got Outta Dodge. Taking the summer to spend some quality time with the kids and stay out of the spotlight to get their shit together seems so… normal. The kids aren’t in school so they don’t have to deal with difficult questions or bullies (or paparazzi) and by the time summer is over things may resemble some sort of normal. Ben and Jen had a good run in terms of celeb marriages. 10 years is a long time for any couple no matter who they are!

My friend Ms.Poehler wrote in her book Yes Please, a 10 year marriage is certainly not a failure – it is 10 years with kids and that’s a long time in any persons life. This is just a new chapter. Now that the couple are out of the prying eyes of the paparazzi you know what that means? The world can speculate with glorious insanity about the who, what and the where, but I know that everyone is really concerned about Matt Damon… who’s getting MD in the divorce? OR!!! (and I LOL’d at this post found on the internets – again, I’m lookin’ at you Cosmo) could this mean that Bennifer the Original could happen again? or maybe I need to stop clicking on links to Cosmo. Could it be the early 2000s all over again? Lets give Jenny from the Block another look/listen. Rocks, Beige clothing, Big Hair and J.Lo. We can have all the fun we want talking about celebs, but in the end let’s hope that the kids are all right and that everyone gets along in the end.



The other day, driving home form work, I passed a high school PACKED with kids in gowns and hats, parents and guardians in fancy summer outfits and the air was buzzing with excitement. As my husband and I sat at the red light watching the festivities we got to talking about our high school experiences. to which I proclaimed “UGH! If I had known a shred of what I know now …” I feel like at some point we all say the same, that time flew by and we didn’t realize there were life lessons to be had. I reached out via social to see if my friends had any advice for their High School Selves and it seems that we all had a few common ideas that we WISH we had known. if you’re a youngster reading this blog (or not) here are a few things my friends thought would be important to share about the high school experience:

  • Spend more time seriously thinking about what you want to do in the future, use this time to explore your options and the world! the world can be your backyard and not just doing that hip back packing through Europe garbage that you see on TV. That whole backpacking through Europe dream is kind of bullshit unless your parents are millionaires and are ok with footing the bill.
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Back packing? probably not! but seriously – no one looks like that good shhlubbing a huge backpack around Europe
  • and I can’t stress enough – if you don’t know what you want to be when you grow up that’s ok too. I can tell you, my last year of high school I spent a good deal of time feeling like shit because people in my world felt that I was a lost lamb. I spent the 1st year after high school without a plan and worked 2 jobs instead, sure I missed out on a few things, but in the end I know that it was the right decision. What if I had gone to school and then wasted money? on one hand it might have worked, but I can’t turn back time. I just really hated how my peers and even my teachers shook their heads at me… like I was some lost cause. Well Look At Me Now Jerks!
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I don’t even have a PLA… and it turns out that not having a plan is ok too.
  • Don’t take yourself too seriously, we get that this is the oldest you have ever been, but you can stop being a dick to people. This is the time to make friends and lasting bonds, not treating people like crap because you don’t think they wear the right clothes or because their gay or because they have a different hair cut than yours. Giving back is important and being an active member in your community is never a bad decision. For those of you reading this who have found people are mean and that these past few years have been hard I feel for you completely and my friends and I tell you in all honesty IT DOES GET BETTER! #itgetsbetter
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here’s me – free from high school and getting to see things from a fresh perspective
  • and most importantly don’t give a flying trout what other people think! I spent too much time worrying about what the “cool kids” thought about what I was wearing when I walked through the cafe. as a Senior I began to realize it wasn’t ever going to be good enough for them and I needed to be happy being me plus those people were morons, they thought it was important to point out my flaws and that my clothes didn’t come from fancier/lame stores in Toronto when in reality they were pathetic – stuff was happening to them and they thought making me feel like crap would somehow make themselves feel better. I can honestly say that those people … well they can go suck an egg… and they are no better.

if you could go back! is that the dream?! to redo your time in high school with everything you know now? would it be better? what would you tell you Younger Self?


Canadian Summers

The summer breeze is finally here!

I don’t know about you, my hordes of fans, but I am pretty excited that summer has officially arrived.

Like all Canadians the summer is a valuable treasures. I’m pretty sure John Mayer sings “It’s those couple weeks of summer that makes the whole year seem worthwhile” PRAISE JM! You sing the truth! and since this past winter it felt like the warm breezes and longer days would never arrive.

A friend on FB wrote “It would be great to spend an entire summer never having to hear complaints about the weather” PREACH! So to get it all out of our system I thought this blog post could be the place where we air our grievances. Get it all out right now. Purge ourselves of the negative and bring in the positive. here is my list to get us started, tell me if you agree/disagree or if I’m missing anything 🙂

  1. sweating in uncomfortable places – for me? it’s underwire/underboobage, I have recently discovered top lip sweat and I am not a fan.
  2. Mosquitos and black flies – they seem to be at most dangerous early in the summer and now that I have a little one I am even more cautious about dusk and dawn play time in the yard.
    1. part 2 – the itchyness. OH SHIIIIT! I wish for ankle bites and other uncomfortable areas for my worst enemies
  3. Algal Bloom – if you are not quite sure about what it is then check out the experts at National Geographic on Algal Bloom. this stuff can sure cramp your summer time fun!
  4. people of a certain age wearing clothing that they just shouldn’t – correction, those who choose to not wear anything. That’s right! I’m taking to you gramps ala cut off shorts or lady mc-braless, I understand it’s hot, but for goodness sakes you can look amazing in summer casuals. same goes for you hot 20somethings why not leave SOMETHING to the imagination.

    Awkward! and Gross!
    Awkward! and Gross! Put the Mouse Back in the House buddy #gunther #friends
  5. also, when is it all of a sudden ok to wear a hillbilly tank top as an outer layer? maybe it’s just where I live…
  6. socks and sandals BAH!

  7. allergies – all winter it’s smooth sailing, then spring/summer creeps up and it’s like MY EYES HAVE NEVER KNOWN SUCH ITCHYNESS AND I MUST TELL YOU ABOUT IT EVERY DAY! (ahem my husband)
  8. your sweet treat melts a little too quickly. So many drips! no one can handle that in a calm way
  9. and finally condensation – I know it’s a little insane, but you have to understand, I am a BIG fan of icy drinks as well as previously mentioned slushy drinks so having to scrounge for a coaster isn’t ideal. But I’ll get all Monica on your ass if I find condensation on my nice table.

NOW Let’s Bring on the Summer FUN!